The Onion: Chicago Police Department To Monitor All Interactions With Public Using New Bullet Cams

CHICAGO—In response to calls for increased transparency and accountability, the Chicago Police Department announced Friday that it will begin monitoring all interactions with the public by using new bullet cams. “To ensure that all contact between law enforcement officers and residents is properly documented, five megapixel, high-definition cameras will be affixed to our standard-grade 9mm Luger caliber ammunition,” said Chicago Police Department Interim Superintendent John Escalante, adding that the bullet cams will capture the majority of public interactions and store them in a database. “We’ve invested heavily to modernize our police force and hope that the initiative will eliminate any misunderstandings between citizens and law enforcement.” When asked whether the public would have access to the footage, a Chicago police spokesperson had no comment.